dude she licked ball and has every Are you afraid of the dark episode on dvd
lock that shit down
So while she was giving me a lap dance I told her I quit med school. Just so she didn't feel like the only one who's made bad decisions in their life.
and she was petting her beer can
you know the rule: 3 consecutive asian hookups makes you an asian fetish guy, no exceptions
It was like fucking a house. Down the chimney. That deep and empty.
How long can I microwave pasta with a 20 percent alcohol content?
I wonder if that one guy remembers you sticking salami to his forehead when he was passed out on new years eve.
I feel like I wont be making enough money to support my frivilous lifestyle of beer and mcdonalds
I feel like ass. I'm missing 12 hours of my life and all I have to show for it is an empty wendys bag. Those Shrooms were too much... When do we do it again?
The highlight of your blackout was when you drunk showered with the garden hose and emailed your boss your vacation requests for the next year.
His search history includes homemade sex toys and a plunger. I'm scared about what goes on in their place.
HE'S LICKING FROSTING OFF OF THE EIGHTEEN YEAR OLD BOY
Ok let me just clear up this blowjob thing first so we can talk about your grandpa
You know the rule about how you feel bad for getting food and not offering other people you're around, does that apply when you eat burger king at a strip club?
Well I told him I’ve got the flu....he said he’d wear a condom
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