I'll just stay a virgin forever then
You still have to go anyway
Then I guess I'll have to start sleeping around
I find it ironic that homeless people are so good in bed
accomplished twins. life is a go
dude i feel like shit
well u did eat a lot of play-doh
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I woke up to 'call me' written in red lipstick on my chest. Thats the hottest/sluttiest thing ever. I win at LIFE!
I walked into the bathroom and the toilet was on fire... I stood there for like a minute trying to decide whether I should put it out or get my camera.
definitely not taking the whole return culture shock so well...drinking a 100 proof rootbeer vodka float out of a german beer mass
We should bet how many people are going to get alcohol poisoning next weekend and whoever wins gets a free Starbucks.
Not sure I just ate a really big pot brownie, I feel like my future is uncertain
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You know it's a good Halloween party when a guy wearing a light-up sombrero offers you blow.
Yeah I was convinced everyone knew I was high. Time was passing way too slowly for anyone NOT to notice.
He held the kayak still so I wouldn't tip over while projectile vomiting. If that ain't true love, I don't know what is...
I'm now using my vagina for good, not evil. Trying to restore balance to the force.
after we got done having sex, you rolled over and ask what your yelp review was. So yea I'm kinda mad.
Lol, perhaps. But the drinks are so cheap, the music is better, and the bartenders and bouncers all know my name. I can't abandon it, even if it is a gay bar, its still my Nirvana.
Randomize