Tell your broad to take a big shot of 'chill the fuck out' and put it on my tab.
Then all the boys were saying that they were amazed at how much i could smoke...i'm so proud of myself
I wont touch it. I promise i wont touch it. JUST GET UNDER THE DAMN TABLE PLEASE.
lady crackhead wearing pjs and a santa hat brushed the snow off my car at 7am saying "free of charge" the whole time
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
For only eating leftover pizza for breakfast today, you sure do have a lot to vomit up...
I think you are the only one slutty enough and evil enough for the job. Just go in and blue ball him. He broke my nose in Middle school. He deserves this.
Haha he's lucky I don't kick him back into the land of the majestic handjobs
Hopefully my orange shoes will distract people's attention from my crippling awkwardness
Just traded a sandwich for anxiety drugs outside the club. I fuckin' LOVE this place.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I was his one phone call from jail and I hung up on him. He's fine though were gonna go to a party now.
Naw but when she was in the bathroom I threw the condom out the window and I'm pretty sure it hit some girl
Sending out old nude selfies with the message "#tbt"
Alas, I cannot find a male suitor sharing my affinity for sport culture who will both manhandle me and treat me with the respect a young Hillary supporter wants and deserves
Do you ever have one of those days when your breasts are just fucking awesome?
I resent the implication of a jizz addiction
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