That girl's pussy is like White Castles, you crave it once in awhile, but you know next morning you regret eating it.
I believe that I finger-banged my way to the top of the corporate ladder.
Isn't the perk of being in a relationship not having to put in effort for sex?
Just looked at my outgoing calls. Seems I had a 7 minute convo with my 10th grade english teacher at 2:56 am Saturday...
The only requirement is that his name is Kevin... All other factors don't matter to drunk me. Drunk me likey Kevins.
since you saved your number in my phone as "the hot chick you met last Friday" I don't know who you are either
We were on the balcony tossing jello shots to people passing below
When people said no i'd yell "i tried them i promise they aren't roofied!"
My mom slipped a condom in my pocket along with a sticky note that said "be safe sweetie."
he told her he was actually impressed that she had fucked more people in this house than the four dudes living in it.
Saved a second guy who was crying/on the verge of wigging out. Just call me the drug whisperer.
Look, sometimes you have to snapchat a topless photo of yourself in the middle of class just to prove you can. I can and I did. End of argument.
also I saw his dick in the morning light and it was glorious. Like staring upon your birthday cake you ordered from heaven and going " can't wait to eat that later"
He finger blasted me like an angel dude
Hey, you know that marble art statue thing in your bedroom? Hypothetically what would happen if a penis got stuck in it?
definitely good. no good can come from sex in a very full public venue.
Randomize
