all thats left of you is your magnum wrapper on my dresser
it was like weight watchers had a halloween party.
In the library. Still drunk. Shoes missnig. Term paper due in fiften minutes. Iff I puke u think theyll throw me out?
i think every time you texted me i responded with 'bathroom floor'
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Good morning! Spongebob is on channel 257 when you wake up. Help yourself to breakfast. You were great last night. See you when i get back.
He realized that I was watching deadliest catch while we were jerkin off on FaceTime.
Want to go swimsuit shopping? First one who cries buys ice cream.
In the mean time, I'll continue to kick ass at running and become a successful stripper while he might hook up with one average looking girl he met at a club. I so win.
See! Theres potential!
Oh yeah. All good relationships start with a threesome.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
When we missed a fist bump and simultaneously did the Rocket Power handshake I knew I was going to blow him.
Please don't try and hook up with one of your high school teacher's friends
It's like the hunger games, but we're gonna bone each other instead of kill each other
dude you know how i got totally hammered and lost my phone at some frat when i came to visit you two months ago? yeah well someone mailed it back to me in minnesota.. with a picture of a cock as the screen savor
I'm trying to secure Christmas dick. Idgaf if he has strep or not.
Is there any reason why a taxidermic donkey head is in the shower?
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