"you've got the devil in yuh. the curse of Jesus is coming on your sex soon." That's what a homeless guy just told me.
I guess so. I don't really give a fuck. I think I'm going to jerk off really loudly tonight just to keep them on their toes
Either your mom needs to stop making spagetti or we need to lay off the anal. I cant tell you how much im in pain.
Spagetti cuz im not giving up the other one.
you know you go to a catholic school when you are rollin a joint with matthew 14:1-12
She brought up feelings... her days are numbered
Shut up. It sucks being the ugly friend, I would know, but someones gotta play the role
I saw him on the jumbotron, its like god doesnt want me to forget his tiny penis
We just found a knife wedged in between the cushions on the couch you guys fucked on...why is this?
They put me in charge of something. Why the fuck would you look at me and put me in charge of something while i'm double fisting peach mimosas at a baby shower
You have permanently scared my back with your nails. I would like to congratulate you on a job well done.
Maybe you shouldn't go to cosmic bowling, i don't know if cum glows and I don't wanna find out i'm sure his parents don't either.
Jake and I will do a protection ritual for ur dick I don't know where she has been
Sleeping in a car was not on my list of plans for the night.
Totally just railed SuperGirl for my birthday. Best Girlfriend EVER!
I think when your throwing up on the highway on the way to pick up your mom from the airport is a sign to slow down.
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