at some point to night u and I have a 'meeting' too...(1-737): I hope so
Yours is on the dinner table...mine is in my underwear drawer.
Judging by the grocery store, everyone stocked up on frozen pizza and beer for the blizzard. If our generation ever faces doomsday, we'll go out smiling.
Made a joint out of my Yale rejection letter. Life is grand.
If a video of someone that looks like me banging that chick on the hood of her car in some parking lot suddenly shows up on the web... let me know, I gotta see how that turned out.
Idk if you remember me telling you about him, but I gave him a hj under the stars. Kind of added a little disney aspect to the whole experience.
Did you get my bra back of the bartender?
I seriously think we need to revision your idea of 'keeping a low profile'
State dependent memory. I just needed to feel my teeth. It was like a fog was lifted.
Bonded with the ladies at the perfume outlet by saying "help me smell like i'm not hungover before my shift starts". This is not where I wanted my life to be
Sweet! It'll be a "that-minor-I-used-to-serve-alcohol-to-is-no-longer-a-minor" party!!!
EX BOYFRIEND'S TWINS WERE BORN TODAY. THIS CALLS FOR A MARG.
Is offering to blow your HR rep considered an ethics violation?
I love that we can live in a world where I can Google "Harry Potter lizard" and an illustration for my dream pops up
I just saw elmo dancing with gumby. The bars at 7a.m. are AWESOME.
Just found out my dad smokes weed too. Mom, grandma, all aunts and uncles, and now my dad too. It's like I'm genetically engineered to be a stoner.
Randomize
