Well someone has to be the Christmas slut at the family dinner. I suppose it's my year to fill those shoes.
My mom just set up beer pong in the dining room for family game night. and you ask why I'm still living at home.
and my souvenir for the night was a nice ambulance blanket
Ima go for a jog. and I'm going to jog until I throw up a lung. then I'll crawl home.
i know i said i'd always be there for you, but i'm beginning to think that what you call "being there for me" the american judicial system calls reckless endangerment.
NEW INFORMATION meech found me passed out on a bench outside.
I vaguely remember making out with his tattoo (?) and giving him an awesome massage and then I passed out on his floor. Shrug
I rocked my own world, he was just a prop.
She's calming us down by shoving oreos in our mouths
You kept chewing on the empty milk carton and saying "kitty" over and over again. It was an interesting night.
One more sleep until playoffs, Canucks are back this year, you bet your ass I'm going to uphold the tradition of being the 90 lb girl that fights every hairy ass Bruins fan at BWW.
falling asleep on a hardwood floor changes a person
Also, my guy said they would be around. And i clarified that when I asked him for mushrooms he didn't hear "a mushroom or two" but rather understood I meant "all the mushrooms you can find between now and 4th of July."
I know right? It's like he knows how to pleasure me better than I do myself... He's like a prophet of sex
I realized my soar muscles form the shape of me leaning over a toilet
Randomize
