i wouldnt be suprised if in indian your name meant "walking lie"
so the situation is a+b=c where "a" is how much you weight, "b" is my gravitational pull, and "c" is how erect your penis is.
apparently i started the naked brigade. and depantsed everyone who wasn't naked. her parents must hate me.
Its where this guy sticks a jar up his ass. Be prepared to be suspended between vomiting and cheering.
dude 8 am is too early to start pregaming for new years eve
clearly you are not from wisconsin
My mom just walked in on me and my girlfriend about to have sex. All she said was "You're lookin like a fool with your pants on the ground.."
We started playin just the tip, then shit got crazy
Did you leave a blizzard on my porch last night? Or was that someone else giving out a metaphorical threat to me?
She's wearing her dead grandmother's pearl on the married finger so no guys "bother her" tonight... I am not THAT committed to Girl's Night.
He pissed on a police station. Then expected to not be arrested. Sounds accurate.
Henceforth: booty calls will now be referred to as "deliveries of anatomy". That is all.
I think I used my hospital ID to cut the coke last night. I need to swab it for residue at work today.
Also I'd apologize for texting you flipping my shit about the science of hair growth while I was shrooming last night but we know each other better than that
Lol woke up with mangoes in bed with me
Get to the bar now. Ryan is single again and every skank on campus that has heard story about his dick is circling like a shark. A cock hungry shark
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