If you're on a tempurpedic mattress do you think you can feel if someone is jacking off right next to you?
in the car goin home for fam dinner and he is silent... i think he realized how big of a whore his little sister is
Don't you hate it when all three people suddenly sober up in the middle of a threesome. Awwwwkward.
dude i feel like at any given point 3/5 of that family is trying to fuck you
I dont even remember coming home... All my stuff is strewn randomly around my apartment... And I woke up at 5 sitting propped up in my bed with just my arm in a shirt
I was drunk for 3 days straight...well wasted for 3 days with periods of "just drunk" inbetween
Then that is decided. Fuck away my little bunny rabbit.
I really shouldn't have to tell you to stop banging your lightsaber on everything while we are in college.
It's not safe here. I had urgent and violent diarrhea last night, and I got blackout drunk. Please don't come over.
And you are going to be so turned on by my batman skills later
You don't usually get feedback after a one night stand... But you hit it out of the park. I'm proud to call you a friend.
The uber man and I sat in silence. With my underwear in my purse and my dress shoved in the pocket of the hoodie the guy gave me.
Said he wanted to wear me as a loincloth. Not sure if sexual or predatory
I FEEL LIKE HILARY MUST FEEL WHEN TRUMP MANSPLAINS AT HER
Have you heard yourself have sex?
I'm not THAT loud...
My neighbors filed a noise complaint.
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