Good face, no body. And apparently her vagina is related to chewbaca.
it took everything i had not to yell out "your name means death in german!"
Is she bent over a couch yet or did daylight savings time throw off her usual schedule?
You guys need to stop introducing me as "the girl you shared"
My mom seriously just told me my insurance company pays for rehab. In an email. I expect a real, not just us joking, intervention coming on. I'm not accepting a "lunch date" with that bitch.
I have come to the conclusion that if you don't fulfill your life ambitions you should go into porn
dont be like that, i wasnt picking him over you. I was picking multiple orgasms over zoolander.
Something about being drunk at 1pm chasing seagulls on the beach while it's raining is very calming
Hungover, threw up in a cosmetic case in my car this morning. This is real life.
I love when groups of boys part so I can walk through. It's like a red sea of penises, and I am their Moses.
I'd rather have snapchat than feelings.
congrats on being the token straight people in our group.
I don't need romance, I need cheese sticks
Based on the conversation I'm going to assume you didn't close the deal.
It started going awry when I fell through a roof.
Going back to our hometown to help Gramma move. Thinking we should see if we can fuck on the desk of the homophobic coach who first introduced us while in town.
Randomize
