Please dont use Danity Kane lyrics to describe your emotions.
id tell you what to do, but my morals dont exactly scream, "Listen to this guy!"
OMG - This guy with a mullet just told me - it wasn't a mullet - but his hair dresser layered it wrong. It's so walmart in here. I hate you.
It was scary, we all screamed. Never make mimosas in a car.
theres a wall by my room thats like, a prime fucking wall. before i move out SOMEBODY is gonna fuck me on that wall, goddamnit.
I was all over the place but at every locale you would pop out of nowhere and hand me a huge drink and say "HAMMERED"
I am the fairy godmother of the drink.
This is irresponsible on your part, leaving me alone in a bar.
So, settle a debate for my housemates. Have you measured your dick. And how long. Results Will not be disclosed
She said I had a really great aura. Which I think is hippie code for "I bet you can give me a mind melting orgasm"
I agree and I would be an awesome dog
I hope I don't have to wait for another triple crown winner to get laid again.
My joke about liking my coffee like I like my men IS ABOUT TO COME TRUE.
And thanks for putting me in that safety position on the bathroom floor while I was spooning the toilet
Rarely does a man I fucked with upgrade from me
I Projectile vomited a massive question mark on Brent's bedroom wall. Don't tell him it was me. I want him to play the whodunit game.
Randomize
