im naked on webcam to her boyfriend, but im playing neopets at the same time, so its all evened out
the semester isnt officially over until i take the batteries out of my calculator and put them back into my vibrator
You don't have to be drunk! I've licked your asshole before
We're learning about the color wheel. Hello college.
Calling yourself a modern day Geisha doesn't justify being a whore.
My neighbor asked me to tell you to stop changing in front of their house. Do I even want to know?
Call me when you get off. I have stories about black lesbians in jail begging to braid my hair...
he fell down during beer pong and the chick told him to rub the sand out of his pussy and suck it up. i am in love
I NEED ANOTHER LEVEL OF CAPS TO EXPRESS TO YOU THE MAGNITUDE OF MY FADDEDNESS
he was extremely fucked up- he thought my sports bra was his boxers. even when his leg wouldnt fit. at least whiskey dick wasnt a problem
Using a 12 year old as a wingman. Does that make me a bad person?
but you were the sluttiest panda there and you need to embrace it
NO FUCKING RANDOMS IN AN ALLEY
Sorry for throwing up in your humidifier last night, I thought it was some sort of electrical garbage can
He's asking how tall I am he wants to make a body suit out of me
Randomize
