she made my bed before she left. i think i'm gonna keep banging her to get the housework done
i was trying to give him roadhead and my tits kept knocking his cheap shifter into neutral...was the first time my tits have ever cock blocked me
How do I tactfully ask if the neighbors downstairs can hear me beating it?
I just feel like Im gonna be remembered as that one RA guy that used to sell weed
Yes perhaps we are both wrong. And did you call me bj girl?
There's a point around the one and a half minute mark where the keg stand goes from impressive to pathetic
Not sure. All I know is that she has a tight dark green skirt and I will not rest until I have used my teeth to rip it off of her
He was humming "here comes Peter cottontail" while unbuttoning his pants. Happy Easter to me
I wouldn't be too worried. He's been known to chase a chubby before.
THAT IS NOT HOW YOU TALK TO YOUR SISTER
Looks better than the half a blow job I got the other night which I had to finish myself. From a chick I refer to simply as "mom jeans".
You are cordially invited to an I'm not pregnant laser tag celebration tomorrow. booze is optional.
I want to die, ON THAT, with that INSIDE ME. ironically, I sense that would be the only time I'd feel alive.
There is a special place in hell for people who only eat the center of the pot brownies.
Would it be creepy if I masturbated with my face in the pillow he slept on last night? Cuz I'm pretty sure that's about to happen
You know your Halloween costume is slutty when you have to shave your pubes to wear it.
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