Nice 2 c u showing ur bro some affection
is it bad that I sent her a picture of my penis on her husbands birthday?
well look at the bright side
maybe you can be on an episode of "I Didn't Know I Was Pregnant"
My gaydar just like overheated and exploded watching the male figure skaters on the olympics
I puked in the revolving door and had to sit down on the escalator. That hungover. It's safe to say people are judging me.
I made him leave at 3am, he texted me a couple minutes later and said the elevator was broken and he was sleeping in there, but he said I was worth it so I don't feel guilty
ex-cheerleader. ex-gymnast. ex-dancer. i dont even know who to go for tonight
i was drinking at the bar last night with a guy with no bottom teeth, wearing zubas and a polka dotted hat. if that isn't the definition of wisconsin, i dont know what is
I just explained it as we hate everyone in the world more then we hate each other. Thus making us friends. Plus we drink...a lot
I think drinking is the foundation of our friendship
He just got here and all he's wearing is a cloth over his penis.
I'll uninvite my mom
I was going to say I needed the exercise but now all I can think about is BJs
My work here is done
I am making it a rule that only people I am comfortable around enough to not have to put a bra on are allowed for Sunday funday. I think that's a good rule for someone who started drinking alone at noon while everyone else here sipped their coffee.
how do you casually eat pancakes with someone after they send you an unsolicited dick pic?
you don't. it's the point of no return for pancake enjoyment.
Told him my main goal was to seduce the man and convince him to leave his wife for me. He didn't argue just asked me to let him know if I succeeded so he didn't waste anymore time not sleeping with the secretary at his office. I have an incredible boyfriend.
I went to watch porn and there's already 3 Santa videos. Happy November 1st.
Randomize
