I'm not conventionally pretty...I'm just crazy
you kept running across the street. everytime you made it across successfully you took something off. can't believe there were no cops around...
oh thats it?
I just made $100 from people paying me not to get naked at the party... I need those P90X dvds
Oh i know my limit. 9 shots after i've given blood.
She kept saying "I'm going to hell" the entire time we were fucking. I really wasn't sure what to do... so I agreed with her.
That was definitely the right answer.
Nah I'm perfectly content solely banging the married bartender once a week.
That's practically a relationship for you
I'll start choreographing the sperm rain dance now
After the nose/jizz incident i think our relationship can handle anything.
I went on my dinner date pretending that my lunch date didn't jizz in my hair.
there's fuck elsewhere to go, I'll be there with 8 lbs of bronzer on my tits
I just watched my mom get dick on Skype.
That d should have definitely been an s.
He pointed at me, then leaned in and said "shes the best at blow jobs" then chris fist pumped him and said "dude, I know"
You have better ratings than Crest. Only 4/5 dentists recommend it. You have 8/9 recommendation for your blowjob skills.
Went to the lab to print and realized the guy next to me was the one we stole all the beer from last night..... Oops
How many Hail Marys does a girl need to say to get some quality nudes?
Randomize
