you ended the night by relentlessly sucking on my hips bone and hand demanding milk. you said it was because you were a tiger
I am watching the symphony and have decided that violin players probably give really good hand jobs.
My bosses just told me they met their wives on one night stands. I'm stoked.
He's really hot. I think he's gonna be my reason to shave this winter.
It was like having sex with a donkey. Everytime she got close she would kick me.
It's a special occasion. Hence the 151.
I found a ladder. I don't know where I am. Gonna climb it. I feel like aladin
Fran... I put my tongue in somebody's gage hole last night.
Her life is filled with shit luck. Its like mother nature is having her period and just taking it out on her specifically.
I FINALLY HAVE A REASON TO DYE MY PUBES BLUE!!!
Every time you visit for the weekend I end up having to bleach my entire house after.
He can't just hit it and quit it and then eat your pop tarts on his way out.
Just went to court for a citation. Guess who my DA was? That girl I ATM'd last weekend. No ticket for me!
Apparently I'm some kind of sexual camel.
Why is there an inflatable flamingo in the backseat of my car?
Randomize
