You hook up with other guys, let him talk to other girls.
no
so i am drinking whiskey and watching home alone 2 by myself. it turns out moving to a foreign country isn't all that different after all.
It was all about her orgasm last night. I felt like a human dildo.
We went into lab today and when no one was looking i touched our cadaver's penis!
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
If a video of someone that looks like me banging that chick on the hood of her car in some parking lot suddenly shows up on the web... let me know, I gotta see how that turned out.
This is like the time you took a picture of your knees and told him it was your tits, isn't it?
Well, during the ride home I had to personally apologize to both of her breasts.
his daughter has his phone and goesss ohhh boobies and shows me a picture of my own tits...
This dudes playing guitar and singing outside our window and he's like "ravioli is beterrrrrrr than tortelliniIii cause tortelliniiii is shaped like fucking ears"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
all I know is this drummer better stop eye fucking me while he plays cowbell. it is way too early for that.
We had sex on the playground and then walked around his neighborhood grading houses based on their Christmas decorations
I got my period during my acid trip. It was weird.
What's the rule for getting in fights with homeless men in suits?
Here's a rule: don't
she keeps trying to brush her hair with leaves and insisting she's not high
Sorry about peeing on your phone last night
Randomize