When I saw him standing at full height, I realized exactly how much his body structure reminds me of his penis.
i cant believe jose lima did steroids
apparently the kind that make you shitty at baseball
just got cropdusted by the delivery guy...this was not in my job description.
I'm sorry..where i come from learning how to exploit a wealthy middle aged man is a right of passage
I understand Curling. That high.
All the walks of shame were condensed into the hour before parents started showing up. Move out day is so bittersweet
Still had my bottle opener ring on. Started to give him a hand job. LOL
JUST MADE A FLAMING SLED. MIGHT HAVE 3RD DEGREE BURNS.
I woke up next to her boyfriend and she woke up next to mine....
This is like a fucked up game of musical chairs.
Because nothing screams stable like yelling at a guy in a bar because last time you hooked up he stole your underwear.
That is romantic
Well sometimes you just gotta put your dicks and pizzas together to show you care
I can't remember what I did last night, but judging from the state of my hair I had a pretty good time.
So congratulations, your penis has now sent me to urgent care not once, but twice!
So this morning everyone commended me for puking over the porch. No one else made it that far...
The bouncer said the club was at capacity we couldnt get in till ppl left all three of them pulled their tits out we got complimentary bottle service never under estimate women
Randomize
