I couldnt find her vag and just started laughing uncontrollably. She was not pleased. Neither was i.
I woke up this morning with gum gluing my ass cheeks together..
I can't decide if I actually want to know or not..
you kept screaming i cant feel my vagina, it kinda killed the mood.
so i hit rock bottom, god threw me a shovel. i continued to dig.
After I saw you grinding on that guy with your shirt completely unbuttoned, I figured it was time for pizza.
coming out of a blackout being surrounded by Disney police was not as awesome as it sounds.
Rosemary is literally sitting on the ground holding on to the rug because she thinks she is going to fall if she lets go. We smoked way too much.
Do you think I need to report to HR that the intern and I had butt sex?
I want a shirt that says, "I'm sorry for the things I said when it was Taco Tuesday"
Went to the lab to print and realized the guy next to me was the one we stole all the beer from last night..... Oops
If there was a gecko involved in your BDSM I'm gonna have to request that not happen when we live together ;)
Noo not in a booty call way, in a 'How are your abs and penis doing today?' sort of way.
Ahaah! I just stole batteries from work for my vibrator. I am that person.
i don't know what it is about you being around kids that makes me want to screw your brains out
That is the creepiest and also the sexist thing you've ever said
i think it's like a sexual celebration of not having kids
I think my roomie is silently judging me for spraining my foot by having sex in a bounce house
so the bounce house and tequila was good idea then?
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