omg, he ripped it...he ripped my vagina...best. night. ever.
I though she ruined it by crying, then I realized it wasn’t a tear, it was my great aim. It turned out to be beautiful.
Planet Earth isn't gonna get stoned and watch itself.
so when I got there he was dressed as jesus in a recliner drinking whiskey out of the bottle watching spanish porn. Then kept shouting dont judge me or ill judge you. we didn't even go to a halloween party.
this guy had a colored tattoo of Chucky on his leg, whatever drugs he does, i want them
Referring to yourself in third person during sex is apparently an instant turn off
Just KTHXBAIed an old man for staring at me
How unacceptable would it be to bar hop with a funnel in the square? It's Halloweekend and I plan on going hard. I can claim it goes w/ my costume. But I don't think the MIMITW uses funnels.
Nothing like wearing your heels and smelling like henney in the afternoon
Covered in confetti and bad decisions
We need to drink more. Just think how awesome it would be to wake up in a trailer and NOT remember how wee got here.
Best case scenario I do a bunch of dirty things to you, blow your mind and you enjoy it. Worst case I stare at you, poke at you, smile and droll on myself, you laugh.
The profile of her ass is just unreal. Weird way to use profile I know, but never more accurate
Sent him a nude and I forgot to crop out the Jesus picture in the background. The Catholic guilt is too real.
Bring shot glasses to the final. Don't ask questions.
I plan on getting so intoxicated, that I think it's MY own birthday
Can I play this game?
Randomize
