i am not above fucking your little sister on your bed
Ambien does the same to me. One time that I took it, I got this huge bowl of spaghetti out of the fridge and thought it was a castle and that the meatballs were little slaves. I ate all of them first and then the noodles were the soldiers and the sauce was the water in the moat. And when I finished, I fell up the stairs and threw it all up.
it was like eating out sand paper
are you looking for your table cloth? Cause I found it around my neck this morning...
sitting in class between the roommates of the two girls i fucked over break. this feels like a bad version of wife swap
just heard a tri-delta girl talking about her drunken escapades last weekend...it's like the exact plotline to a hardcore porno.
Somehow I gave him blood blisters on his dick...I don't know if I'm that good or that bad.
There is a good chance that the other night after a wedding reception i was at that i mailed you a drink coaster.
He took getting"shit in your neighbors hot tub drunk" way to literally
I don't know where he learned to eat pussy but I thought I was going blind
He said he wanted to "superfuck" me
Does he wear a cape??
Is there a lightning bolt coming out of your boner right now?!
i have two papers due tomorrow. contemplating if i should take adderall in my anus for full effects
Also I like oatmeal more than sex.
I texted her mom a picture of us doing it saying "I'm trying to make your daughter just like you!" she was not amused.
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