You guys seriously fuck to bieber? That's embarrassing...
you threatened to puke on the table cause they didnt serve eggs Benedict
Hung over. Bed full of legos for some reason. Not getting up. Come build stuff with me.
So can we talk about how we all three made out with the bike taxi driver in lieu of paying him. I'm not even mad, that's resourceful. You know what married girls would have had to do? They'd have had to pay.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Ladies, we have an appointment at David's Bridal aurora this coming Sunday at 3pm. And an appointment at where ever tequila is served at noon.
pretty sure that drunk girl we saw climbing the stairs is now DJing this club....
We've cranked the heat for blizzard versions of all of our strip games. Come over.
Looking through last night's sexting, realized one is a haiku..
I'll come hang out with you guys later, but right now my parents aren't home and I have to take full advantage of being able to watch porn on full blast.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Cuz I feel like I ate the whole candy isle at 7/11 last night and chased it with rum
You pretty much did tho
Someone just asked me if I was chewing red hot gum.... I'm LITERALLY SWEATING OUT FIREBALL.
I never thought I'd say this but there's too many dicks around here.
I'm laying in my bed in the fetal position with a bag of frozen peas on my head and the bathroom trashcan next to me. Fucking tequila.
No he doesn’t answer my texts except for like on New Year’s Because like I was fucked up on New Year’s and he said happy new year and I told him the same and I called him dragonslayer and you can’t really recover from that
I think I gotta smoke less weed, I'm getting to lazy to fuck my girlfriend
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