just bought a coffee grinder that advertiesed spacious grinding chamber...new nickname for my bedroom?
she met some random, took his vcard, peed in his bed, left, and then requested him as her boyfriend on facebook
that's almost as bad as that time i almost ashed in a baby carriage
11am puke and rally. THIS is what I'm gonna miss about college.
The 19 Strangest Things People Use To Get Off
Supposedly i was taking multiple birth control pills while screaming dot judge me. Never going back
I really want to title the album "I want to make sex with your face" but I also want a job someday. Temptations, temptations.
he actually managed to pick a girl up by telling her that her skirt was ugly and she didnt do a good job with her makeup. thats some seriously low selfesteem
You've been drinking wine and eating bacon all afternoon. HOW IS THAT DOING GOOD?!?!
In complete seriousness I think I am the highest person on earth
These 25 Normal Couples Tried Porn Moves During Sex And It Ended Horribly
It's like god made him fantastic at oral to make up for what his mouth does the rest of the time.
Ummm didn't i have pubes when i went to bed last night?
We ended up at a lesbian bar and all my co-workers tried to get me laid. This is not how I envisioned coming out.
I JUST WATCHED PAULA DEEN PUT BUTTER IN HER BLOODY MARY. This is not a drill. Real life.
you start one little fire by the lake and the police want to talk to you all night...
I've had my dick out in public way too much for someone my age...