just fed a duck at the lake a weed brownie. it hasnt moved in 20 minutes.
There are walks of shame and then there are walks of what the hell is wrong with you.
Um he just came into the kitchen naked to get her purse or something?
How does me getting a new dildo make you crave olive garden
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You haven't puked in my sink in over a year.. Youre coming over this weekend
He asked me if we could throw a lingerie party together so I guess he's single again
I woke him up with a blow job and he started sing "oh the USAAAA. IT'S GOING TO BE S BEAUTIFUL DAYYYYY"
If he shows up in a "mount n dew" me shirt im throwing him to the lesbians
Unlike bears, this weekend is not the #1 threat to America. It is, however, the #1 threat to my liver
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Is eating fries while lying on the floor bad for you?
If I choke and die at least I will have been doing something I love
I was woken up in my old house by the new residents ... I don't even have a Key anymore
My brother didnt wanna sleep with her because she was my friend. Did I miss the memo where we're not supposed to be fucking each others friends? Oh well too late.
Just skate-of-shamed, shirtless, with a bucket or margaritas. Good luck beating that one.
The amount of knuckle children I've had to the Farrah Abraham sex tape is disturbing and impressive
Side note, from now on any snap chat I get that isn't interesting enough... Is getting a dick in response. Judge your snaps accordingly
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