I was staring at you from my window across the quad. I wanted to let you know so it's not creepy
what time did you get home last night?
SO late...when your in the lap of a 35 year old superstar you loose track of time
He said to me " i could be your father but i dont care"...it was so hott
Please tell me this is my four loko that I just woke up in....
I would be the drunk girl eating cake on the front steps alone.
Still had my bottle opener ring on. Started to give him a hand job. LOL
i'll get you drunk even if i have to inject alcohol into your arm through an IV
you're the only one i would trust to do that
Is it bad that all my wine bottles have teeth marks in the cork?
My dad, when he got home and saw me loading a bowl in the living room: "We have TWO beautiful balconies to get high on and you pick the couch?!"
Third base with a 7ft basketball player last night. Fingers like a champ. I call him Edward Penishands.
This holiday season is going to be rough between people coming home for the holidays and the already regulars on my list I might have to clone my vagina to make sure I get everyone for all they are worth
Got it in all night, now at a bar at 730 am and we are the only two people here. Somewhere my mid twenties father is applauding me.
Don't I can pass these orgasm blushes off as sunburn for much longer...
Just check with her if girls can get blown, that's all.
I wrote myself a letter, like I think drunk me wants to be pen pals or something
He licked the buffalo sauce off my fingers and then we had the best sex of my life.
Randomize
