So at what point while he was throwing up on the girl next to him did you think "yeah, im going to hit that"
THEY SHOULD WARN YOU WHEN THEY MAKE JELLO SHOTS WITH JACK DANIELS!!! THEY SHOULD WARN YOU!!!!!!!
at which point I apparently ran in and shouted "I made the sex with that one!"
I was on my way at Dorito Smoothie
i screwed him while his gf was puking in the shower. 2011 is looking up already
im pretty sure this vending machine only exists when im drunk
looking at that huge scar on my leg from when i got drunk at 9 AM and walked into a grill. so excited for football season to start again!
He asked me if I wanted to play "Edouard Mandevan," turns out that's French for Edward Winehands
Or stump rather since he's possibly large. Large penises don't have tips, just blunt ends of battering rams.
These fuzzy pants work great for sleeping, taking an exam, getting baked and watching the hobbit. I guess i'm not changing pants for 72 hours.
Hung over and there is no way in the world I can make this mess look good today. Only solution is to stay drunk.
Wow two curved penises in one weekend. I feel like this may be good luck. Like finding a four leaf clover
At least I got steroids and a baguette out of the deal
I just want to find somebody intelligent enough to trick my parents into thinking she's not a trophy wife. Is that too much to ask?
The only thing good about being back at work is the lunch time hand jobs from the MILF
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