Dude that chick in the corner just threw up
Hot
I'm youtube-ing children's choirs. Am I adorable? Or am I a child predator?
Predator. Straight up.
Sorry about all the noise last night. We were trying to break bottles by kicking soccer balls at them. If it's any consolation, there's shattered glass and blood all over my kitchen.
and ill be dreaming of you. not in a creepy way, but in an inappropriate way
i gave him a hand job with one hand and held the 40 with the other. this is like freshman year all over again.
Just sponge bathed with a swissper. Thrush inevitable. Shaking.
Hey everyone. This evenings celebration will commence with a cocktail hour at genghis at 830 to be followed with an upscale dining experience at taco bell at 10. All are welcome. This is not a joke. Thank you
Worst case scenario: I have VD and will die. That's the worst that could happen. As long as I'm around long enough to see the winner of bachelor pad, I'm cool
Don't ask how or why, but I think the 775 on the inside of my lip is permanent
Our innocent game of 'Duck, duck, booze.' ended up not being so innocent
Rush week is fine, only the t-shirts are white and if it rains, the frat boys in their lawn chairs will be treated to 800 freshmen girls in their first wet tshirt contest.
Welcome to college.
Pretty sure my boner drove me home. Like it didn't just do the steering it was the gas and brake too..
I remember the Prince Albert and the three penises in the threesome. But the rest no.
You have no idea how awkward it is fucking someone with the same name as your dog
I had to explain to the doctor why I'm peeing blood. He still didn't believe a girl would have that much sex... You could feel the judgement forming in the room when I went into the details...
Damn, well a girls gotta get laid too
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