My head feels like little people r playing bumper cars inside it
is it really weird I just got "suckable tits" in my honesty box and I'm flattered??
do girls know yet that the best boners are in the morning?
Does having sex in the men's bathroom on the boardwalk count as having sex on the beach?
i'm not going because i feel like it's just gunna be a "this is your life" who i banged this years addition
Why the fuck did you text me at 4 in the morning telling me not to have sex with the bird?
asked the cab driver where he learned Swahili last night.
COME GET ME FR THE HOSPIGAL'!!!!!
I hope it's socially acceptable to wear a mesh one piece into last call tonight?
Suddenly I feel like all I did this summer was have sex in our apartment
Just found out that guy A from the threesome I had is now dating guy B's younger sister
Things are very odd on my 29th hour of being awake. Thought there was a bird in my lecture hall and it was just a girl putting up her hair. What even
Where you been?
Please tell me this is a booty call
I just peed on myself the semester has officially began.
My parents heard a lamp fall and crash and the dogs were barking like crazy so my mom got up to check. she found you peeing in a corner by the tv. And you kept shhhing her.
Randomize
