My roommate just did the walk of shame in last nights corset back to our room to find her dad there. THATS why i go to school out of state.
yeah. pants. i need to put pants on. i didn't do that last night. big mistake
Seriously just heard: "we need some good ass wine. how bout this swa-vig-non blank"
hahahaha. Oh virginia: where the south begins
Its 4 am and he honestly tried throwing pizza at his ceiling for decorations
I just used dish soap as body wash. I smell like a dishwasher exploded. isn't the end of the semester fun?
he payed over $300 just to break into the hotel pool and skinny dip alone for 5 minutes and then peace in a cab. and all he had to say for himself was "gotta go swimming, gotta live life"
where do u find these people!?
thanks for the bloody nose. you probably dont remember, i'm not mad.. only because your boobs are to blame
Your life is one shit show away from being a lifetime movie.
That was a very uncomfortable conversation to have without pants on. But his mom was pretty cool about it.
You owe me beer. On another note, I made out with the ups guy at work today ....
Oh my god. We just got locked out of our cabin and went to the neighbor's to see if they had a key and caught the neighbor jerking it. My night > your night
Hypothetically speaking how does one remove a lamp that they hypothetically superglued to the ceiling?
Acetone nail polish remover, and you lied about studying last night didn't you?
Oh definitely.
Ugh. I just found a cum stain on my mermaid pants. Now I can't return them.
I was playing 'If You Had To Fuck One or Die' with the old composite pictures with a guy in the bathroom line. They were all pretty ugly so I go "You can tell this is a lower tier frat"......turns out the guy was a brother
You know its a good morning when you wake up with blonde hair extensions in your pocket. . .
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