ok what kind of idiot turns down casual afternoon sex?
at a party and just made O-H-I-O out of dicks and vajayjays...i hope someone took a pic i was too busy (; GO BUCKS!!!
you did pass out in the elevator last night, so it could be motion sickness
she said we were using the spray butter as air freshener
his roommates said i can move in if i promise to only drink tequila the rest of the semester. challenge accepted.
This bowl of cereal would be the size of a giant's bowl-piece. It's. that. big.
How much did you smoke??
well I have to shit but I'm too hungover to push, and I snorted advil so I wouldn't have to swallow it and throw up.. hungover is an understatement.
Can't. Busy recovering from the worst pulled muscle of my life that I got either from excessively acrobatic boning or carrying a huge fucking ice luge down the street while wearing 4 inch heels
My mom just found my nipple clamps...... oh God why....
i was on the fire escape while he ate me out for a while before i realized he had shut the door behind us and locked us out and i proceeded to climb down the stairs and climb back into the party through the window.
i can only hope to be on your level one day.
I woke up with my wool blanket soaking wet on the dorm room floor, and my sweatshirt hanging on the shower door down the hall. So basically my camp-out-in-the-bathroom idea didn't turn out as planned
I didn't think it was possible but he dislocated his thumb during intercourse last night then cried
I got his number because he was "impressed with how much I could handle"...I was chasing shots with Olive Garden breadsticks...
I found it. now I'm going to the gym to be "healthy" or whatever that folklore is called.
As in, legitimately worried. You just sent me a 6 message long text that did not contain any complete words.
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