He said he was just looking at my pictures and was thinking about how he wanted to cut my hair..then dye it black and put platnium blonde extensions throughout it and layer my hair
Well listen chief - never again do i want the scenario of going to the ER totally naked and partially drunk to b a possibility.
some 7 year old just told me his favorite rapper was eminem and kim got what she deserved...god damn today's youth is in a dark period
Well if I fail my finals for being drunk on Cinco De Mayo there is always next year to graduate.
You said that last year...
He plays me like an instrument...he is the Carlos Santana of my vagina.
I've had cake for breakfast the past 3 days. You tell me how bikini season is going.
he was terrible at kissing, so i just kept letting him motorboat me. he seemed very pleased with my choice
You said, "can you make out with him for a little bit, I need a break."
Her roommate "grounded" her because she drunkenly tried to fill their fish tank with vodka
Remember that time you gave me a fat lip with your vag? We should do that again!
I'm not entirely sure that the guy that just texted me is not on drugs right now. I'm also not entirely sure that he isn't about to be incarcerated.
We peed on campus in the middle of the tailgate and then hit on a married cop that asked you to stop touching him
I'm like a freaking volcano of life and sexual frustrations
It happend again, swimming on the floor... Vodka is my friend
So I ended the trip with two cold sores, poison ivy on my leg and vagina, and no alcohol or weed. WORST. 4TH. OF. JULY. EVER.
Randomize
