I'm not unpopping my collar. This shirt is too expensive to crease.
i have a new swear word: supercalifuckaliciousexpialadamnit
is it bad that the first thing i do when i get downstairs is go on farm town?
Dont you think its a little early in the relationship for sexting?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Only I could do what I did last night and feel perfectly ok working around children the next day
So the first 4 hours of my morning was equivalent to seeing under water. Things were starting to get better until I remember I drank mustard for free stuff and flossed my teeth with a strand of hair from a stranger in the bathroom.
NO. ANAL IS NOT A GAME.
You raged at the rock climbing place for not selling beer and then just said "fuck it" and pulled out a flask.
i found waldo and immediately set him to work eating me out. please have more out of season costume parties.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just look at my butt and see so much potential.
I mean I know I'll get over it by like tonight but ew ew eww. I cannot. Dude I don't even know his name also I threw up on his penis
I had to try on three different bathing suits to hide my boob hickies
New guy moved in the apartment next door. He's a combat vet, 6'4", Adonis body and going to med school. My vagina is chewing thru the wall as we speak.
when u match a guy bc he's from Oregon & he's trying to flirt, shut up i just want to talk about trees
I ACCIDENTALLY MURDERED MY COUSIN
HOW DO YOU ACCIDENTALLY MURDER YOUR COUSIN
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