just got waxed at a place I havent been to in a while
woman didnt remember me then in the middle of waxing she announced that she just didnt recognize my face
She called me Jeff during sex, I just kept going like nothing happened. To think, if I was a woman that would be a problem.
Dave a horae rider a coqw boy
A guy wearing a hard hat while floating the river. It's the most responsible drinking we saw all day.
I ended up naked in a pond with you-know-who and your saying your a good babysitter? Dick.
Yeah he's definitely gonna feel that one when he wakes up. I beat the shit out of him with that broom handle.
he said i balance and complete him. i feel sick
why would you automatically assume i'm high...
you just told me you're eating the powder of a lemonade mix.
He's in the hospital yelling at his brother to at least have stuck something "normal" up his ass.
Again?
A drawer in my room has nothing but a large feather quill, a wine glass, and a 15" Bowie knife. If you could put my life in a drawer I think that would be it.
Also I like this area. Lots of places for me to get tacos.
Mom told me you snuck booze into a concert in a cheez its box...I have never been prouder to be related to you
Puke-y regrets or just things-seem-far-away regrets?
saw a family tailgating a graduation with hard liquor... i'm assuming yours?
are you shitting me? they told me they'd at least wait until 10am
what did we do after we left your crib?
you layed down in some rocks for about an hour, you stole some pumpkins, you passed out and started shaking, we got t-bell, we took you back to the dorm.
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