Very drunk. laura says hi. i can't find my pants. i think i'm in philly, but it might be jersey somewhere
Question: terrible or awesome when a girl give you head so vigorously that you get a hickey of sorts
Hands down the best time I've ever had barfing.
i've been throwing up a lot lately. my guess is hangover but who knows morning sickness is always an option
i wish i had the videos of us pissing on him last night.
He came in my nose, then said it would help clear my sinuses.
Is it love? I honestly haven't even thought about watching porn for over a week now, and haven't thought about fucking any strangers either. It's quite eerie.
I have her designated blowjob hair tie on my wrist. It's like a key to eternal happiness
After your flask fell out of your leg brace and you told your RA that it was juice, you tried to unlock your dorm room but your key was attached to your bra so he ended up seeing your boobs
He saw one of my bras on the floor and said "damn you could eat soup out of this"
i now understand why vodka
I woke up and finished the bottle like a champ
my roommates are pretty pissed at me. they sent me out for ice and i came back with a kitten.
And our sex soundtracks thus far have been metal and Star Wars
I was left to my own devices with nothing to do but drink
Randomize
