he used a semicolon in his bootycall text, of course he's not gonna go down on me.
Just a heads up: The party is Fourth of July themed. Spread the word
dude its may
Work with me here, man.
I don't know what's worse: going to the liquor store at 9am or knowing that its open at 9am
I feel like we had some profound moment last night, but I can't really recall much past your ass turning up the volume on the radio.
Some guy thought i was the waitress and handed me his credit card. drinks on me.
Unless you have figured out how to blow me through the phone don't drunk dial me.
New low, passed out while taking a shit for an hour with my parents home, suprised they didnt notice
I'm laying in bed with a case of beer,.. That's how this break up is going..
Is it a good time to tell him he's getting too clingy if he sent me a picture of my name spelled with Cheerios?
Even worse we were making a sex tape so our reaction to the condom breaking was recorded.
Honestly you'd think more guys would be happy to date a cute female dealer, but apparently something about safety or whatever
Watching the blind side bc I need a good cry to make sure I'm still human after this weekend's questionable life choices
UVE SEEN MY TITS OKAY STOP CRYING
We only initially bonded over boobs and sarcasm
I just got offered free tattoos if I smuggle some guns from OKC to Dallas for a guy in the hells angels
Randomize
