tell her no need for introductions. and that you've read about her on the back of toilet doors.
i'm in hospital, i have an exam in 3 hours and the man in the cubicle next to me is doing a noisy poo. this has to get better.
Welcome to my life. currently drinking beer through two straws. easier/faster that way.
my ass has officially been on the floor of every fraternity on this campus
and who said we didn't have goals?
He probably smells like baby powder and sexual identity crisis.
In either case, seeing now as it's basically two couples, unless we're planning to have a good old fashion orgy I think this isn't going to work out so well.
He's def the type to chop us into bits whilst screaming "NAPA BITCH". AKA my type
I'm convinced he's the patron saint of oral sex
Ok well i was gonna say you can only borrow my fog machine if you will use it to emerge from your room in a cloud of smoke after having sex with sarah, so yeah we're good
Ugh. The fucking vaginal recession is so real right now.
Explain why there's a meatball in my bong
Bring me a cialis. .. I feel like having a super dick today
I mean if you can't appreciate a good looking dick then just get out.
It seems that Coffee is the true alpha male.
I'm a peeled potato compared to her. I'm a peeled potato compared to anyone. I'm a peeled potato.
Are you high?
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