puked in the new hous. now it's officially home.
Your roommate was biting my friend last night. It was weird.
i just sold back the books i vomitted on
i felt obligated to tell him happy birthday since we trashed his house and i fucked his friend in his basement
Gina was bawling her eyes out and then she ran into the street and peed. she kept screaming "LOOK WHAT YOUVE DONE TO ME"
At least she'll always have a story about the time she showed up to the emergency room drunk and covered in chocolate syrup on her birthday.
She pulled vodka outta the dryer and told me to drink it
I feel like on the last day of finals we should run around campus dressed like Moses screaming "LET MY PEOPLE GO!!!!"
I'll start the recruiting
I did not appreciate your texts about spanking at 3'o'clock this morning.
it's not like I want to die, I just want life to stop for a little bit. how does that work?
Is this the point in which we come to terms with our lesbianism or is that after you send me more ass pics...
I mean metaphorically speaking, maybe we've all fucked on top of a frat house at some point in our lives
Let go out that Thursday night!
Yess sounds good, I have to go turn myself in the next day because what happened last Friday.
I just found your "it's drinking time" note in my chem notes. Why did this never happen??
I was waiting for you to find it...I'll be over in 5
It was platonic naked porno viewing, I swear.
Randomize
