Dork........ .......... .. . ...... ........... .. . ... ...... .. . .... ..... .. .... ... .......... .... . . ..... Yeah its morse code, no big deal
guys don't fucking realize that the only place girl like their faces jizzed on is in PORN, and that "squirting" is piss. JUST FUCKING PISS.
Haha, bad night?
With sake I got over my irrational fear of seafood. Now I just fear sake.
I just saved him in my contacts as "Has 2 kids.. don't drunk text"
She is two pictures of justin bieber away from being blocked from my news feed
when you tell me you got me a birthday present, I have to assume it will show up in a drug test.
u girls! girls! girls! have fun please don't hook up w/ a roadie! Love, mom
I have a 16 minute video of you talking about your life. We are calling it your Anthology sponsored by Steel Reserve
And then, I saw the prophecy come to fruition. It was the Dick of Destiny.
6 beers, 3 orange crushes, & half a fire ball later & you get my alter ego.
I should not be so motivated by a penis, but I am
The problem with having a roommate is that you are forced to answer the age old question "Are you okay?"
You never know true fear until you're on your period in a house full of white furniture.
I had one beer! ONE BEER! They took shots in mourning of my tolerance last night. My ability to drink is a joke.
Who the fuck stole my fridge again
Randomize
