Dear __, it'd be a lot easier to fuck if you ever responded. So I'm throwing in the white towel, since I no longer know what you want. Sincerely, ___
I skipped work to stalk him.
Forgot that I saved my paper as "Eat Shit Edwards" and e-mailed it because I missed class. I'm sure Prof. Edwards will be delighted when she gets it. I don't anticipate a passing grade.
Spent 30 minutes in the board meeting trying to figure out where the foul smell was coming from. Thought it was the guy's feet sitting next to me. Then i uncrossed my legs. Turns out it was my vagina. Thank goodness for travel size febreeeze.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
she said and I quote "NO SOUP FOR YOU!!!" and closed her legs.
i woke up to the sound of my roommate climbing onto my desk mumbling that she was going to bed
I left him a voicemail saying i went through with the abortion and he texts me back one thing... the bbm "phew" face. really?
Just found out they make medicinal lollipops, bought like 40 of them. Gonna go fill a pediatricians lollipop bowl.
sorry for allegedly lighting the beer pong balls of fire
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Apparently it is frowned upon to ask the bouncer to stop pointing his flashlight in your face and step back so you can puke....and then do it
Bailing my boss from jail at five in the morning.. If thats not a promotion I don't what is.
Her vagina was like a painting you can put your face in.
Dunno. My heart says "no", my brain says "maybe" and my dick says "YES YES FOR THE LOVE OF GOD YES!!"
If you're signed up as "sober sister" can you do cocaine or nah
i dont believe you. i want proof. if you end up at a hospital send me a pic.
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