Came home to a chalk baord that read:" Think like a rapist." Can't say I'm surpirsed.
Hawaiian shirts and no dignity
We are always on the same wavelength...kinda eerie.
Well i'm not entirely sure considering he gave my vagina an early valentine's day card that said "you're purrfect."
I sang Jenna happy bday in the middle of throw up hurls
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We're having a serious conversation and I just responded to something he said with an emoticon. I am so baked.
Valuable lesson learned: if you reach the point where you have to talk yourself in to finishing the last half of your beer, you shouldn't try.
it's a simple rule - pass out shirtless on the couch, become an airsoft target.
my dad pointed to my full beer and said drink up we're leaving now.
can you adopt me?
I took out the emergency phone in the elevator and replaced it with a bottle of vodka. The game is simple, do a shot for the number of the floor you're going to. Best suggestion box tip ever.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's always great when the guy I get pills from sends me an email that says "I know you will get clean it's going to be hard but I know you can do it"
If he doesn't get here soon I'm taking off my thong and eating his dinner.
I found a bar with Metallica and a fire eater. I'm home
Mom said it is up to us to plan Thanksgiving. Hooters or Scores?
Or???
He ran out to tell us that somebody flooded the bathroom, then went back in there fell on his ass and asked why the floor was wet
Love that I’m sending my uber driver a thank you message for taking me home via mcdonalds tonight before I’m messaging my date from tonight! Lol
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