we lost you for like an hour and then found you at some dive bar trying to teach dance lessons
Come on, video tape it. Take one for the team
Get everyone out of their dorms and watch 3 girls do the walk of shame from my room.
I made out with him with my retainers in. My drunken hook-ups get lazier and lazier.
we were bear claw grabbing his crotch in the middle of the bar yelling prominent ridge over and over.
When u wake up, don't be alarmed by the passed out mariachi band, they're cool. Muchos gracias
yea, there's something about a stripper whipping you with your own belt that makes you think
Best part of being a cop: When I showed up at Thanksgiving with stitches in my head I could tell them I was "protecting and serving" not "drinking and falling down". Career validated.
Strip club for my birthday. And none of this discrimination shit. We're going to a guys one and girls one. Go get your singles.
Only you could walk of shame to a childrens pirate themed birthday party
I opened my eyes this morning, looked at the sunlight and made this hangover my bitch.
Ok so I didn't mean for his first impression of me to be lying face down on his roommates bedrooms floor throwing up my jäger but it happened. Atleast my ass looked good in those jeans. Think I still have a shot?
The old guy next door tried to get me to go to his apartment for shots formoonshine. =-0
If that weren't so sketchy I would encourage it
Yeah it was almost as sketchy as a white panel van pulling up offering candy
Your actions as of last night have earned you over thirty new nicknames.
Drunk wound on my leg hast healed and neither has my dignity
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