Hi, this is ****, we hooked up a few weeks ago. I was wondering, do you have any STDs?
Pre-pickelized cucumber-hand invasion!! RUN!!!!!!!!!!
Why did I wake up this morning with 10 tally marks on my hand and a penis drawn on my tits?
we banged on the home plate. i wasnt even aware of the significance of where we were until afterwards hahaha
I just couldn't load the family groceries on to the same seat where I had sex 12 hours ago.
370HSSV 0773H read that upside down
what are you doing with your life
I just took my birth control with a water bottle I found in my purse with vodka in it in Spanish class. 10am is still too early for me.
If man night ends at some point, hit me up and let me prove my vagina still exists.
What's it called where you go to the stripclub with two guys that have both gone down on you...
Tuesday
I want to get "Patrick Kane" wasted tonight
I am one hundred percent down for that
facebook is just a cold reminder of all the times other bitches won my hookups
I'm pretty sure that's why we have such good sex because we are secretly trying to kill each other
Ya it was crazy the power went just as she was about orgasm and the vibrator got fried with the power surge
It is NEVER not funny to me when I am sitting at a table and I've touched the dicks of every single person I'm sitting with.
Nope. I'm an adult now. I can successfully avoid to vomit in defiance of the porcelain god\n
Randomize
