Operation extremely regretful is in full effect
Went to gas station for smokes. three cops pulled in. got gas i didn't need. found diff gas station.
good choice.
how am i supposed to spank it to a shakira video when she looks like she is doing the robot?
I would have rather watched a full length video of myself masturbating than heard that.
I am too drunk to deal with your everything. Reread this everytime you feel the need to talk to me.
I know. he thinks we're 'meant to be'. No we're fucking not. God wouldn't give my soulmate a pencil dick.
I believe I can fly has to be one of the most inspirational songs of our time. Seriously R. Kelly nailed it
Then he went and peed on those teenagers.
Just so you know, if I get bored tomorrow I WILL pretend to get drunk in the bathroom and crash the whole thing
I'm not the one who gave a guy that lives next door to my grandmother a blowjob in a pub bathroom in Ireland, you have no room to judge.
There comes a point, as I lay on the floor of the work disabled toilets contemplating catching 10 minutes sleep between chunders, that I wonder if its really worth it
I just want to braid flowers into his hair and steal all of his pills.
ive started thanking my toys after masturbating. might be time to get some fuck boys
Well you went to the bar with your crutches last night & everyone including the DJ started chanting "put your crutches in the air"
I haven’t sent any nudes yet in 2018.
That’s not true...is it?
As a side note, can you ask the maintenance staff not to drag their balls on our stairwell handrails. Please.
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