I woke up this morning in a strange bed with a kid with an accent playing with my feet.
i'm pretty sure you said "blowjob marathon" lastnight
i totally said that
This last weekend single handedly took me off the liver transplant list
It was ok at first, but now im getting freaked out by him jerking off to me doing yoga
dude i have an english essay and a bio lab due tomorow
so basically your not goin out tonight?
who said that?
He gave me his number and said the usual call whenever you need someone but then was like... or just call me.
You would pick up a guy in AA.
in the event i get tipsy, my nipples are your responsibility
yea man just watch out- theres a shitload of broken glass in your bed
you also choked him out with your legs on the kitchen floor..
I'm having horrible flashbacks of being groped by Pauly Shore.
i shit in a pringles can and hid it somewhere in your house....happy hunting
My bed is full of blood and feathers
There is a severe lack of banging on that itinerary... I'd like a revision on my desk within the hour
A man can only lie in bed watching COPS for so long before he wants to do things that can lead him to starring on the show.
Were you the one who yelled "FOR GLORYHOLE!" then punched a hole through my door?
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