What would you say if someone told you they liked your lips?
Which ones?
It's more exciting when they aren't single....and even better when you have to pretend that you just slept with their roommate while trying to do the walk a shame as their girlfriend comes marching into the apt.
Im not the least bit jealous of the life you lead.
Does he know anything about your personal life besides what you look like without clothes on?
you have a cum towel under your bed, you're the definition of single
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we flagged you as soon as you tried to put the lime in the microwave to prove it was really a kiwi. again.
You skyped me last night to show me the girl passed out on your bed.
What's a nice way of saying "You fell asleep, and I got bored, so I made out with your brother"?
I don't know if I want to cry scream puke or go somewhere and drink more. This is such a weird emotion.
he had me stop mid-blow job to make me use my phone to id a song on the radio..
i wasnt really sure how to responde to that.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Had sex and ran 2.8 miles all before 7:30am. This is going to be a very productive Monday.
So...guess who had sex tied to the ladder of a caboose under the stars in Joshua Tree? This bitch
Cause I know you wanna ride the D like a Vespa in ROMAN HOLIDAY
we played his NES Classic. Turns out there is a warp zone to my vagina.
That means I have to put pants on. That is not something I am willing to do right now.
Just because I know you’ll get a kick out of this, I sneezed earlier and cupcake frosting came out
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