Texts From Last Night

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  (818): View more from California

  Its about making memories worth repressing

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  (818): Its about making memories worth repressing http://tfl.nu/5fiw
  Replies (1) Good night (2602) Bad night (494) Order T-Shirt
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  (516): View more from New York

  He ripped my extensions out during sex, not noticing until this morning when he saw them on the floor. I told him they werent mine and he went and threw them in his sister's room.

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  (516): He ripped my extensions out during sex, not noticing until this morning when he saw them on the floor. I told him they werent mine and he went and threw them in his sister's room. http://tfl.nu/sh2m
  Replies (20) Good night (683) Bad night (3009)
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  (785): View more from Kansas

  Apparently when he woke up I was tripping my face off. Everytime the cat meowed I would meow back. This went on for several hours.

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  (785): Apparently when he woke up I was tripping my face off. Everytime the cat meowed I would meow back. This went on for several hours. http://tfl.nu/zm6d
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  (214): View more from Texas

  I just saw a hobo ride by on a unicycle. Good day.

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  (214): I just saw a hobo ride by on a unicycle. Good day. http://tfl.nu/pcf7
  Replies (26) Good night (5168) Bad night (456) Order T-Shirt
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  (240): View more from Maryland

  and now her best friend is massaging my table under the leg. this may not end well.

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  (240): and now her best friend is massaging my table under the leg. this may not end well. http://tfl.nu/nn8d
  Replies (12) Good night (2963) Bad night (810) Order T-Shirt
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  (215): View more from Pennsylvania

  There are drunk kids outside our building hugging that cop that's always on his bike as he's citing them for public drunkenness. It's not even 11 am.

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  (215): There are drunk kids outside our building hugging that cop that's always on his bike as he's citing them for public drunkenness. It's not even 11 am. http://tfl.nu/7bo4
  Replies (5) Good night (3089) Bad night (873)
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  (310): View more from California

  I hereby state that I am over the age of 18. If I am not of age to purchase or consume alcohol products, I hereby acknowledge that I have not received any alcohol products from said party host. Also, in the event of injury or death, said party host is not to be held accountable. Please reply with your full name and today's date for your e-signature". *note: no text, no entry.*

  (310): View more from California

  Sorry bro, just a precaution. You know, ever since the "Jake incident". What a douche.

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  (310): I hereby state that I am over the age of 18. If I am not of age to purchase or consume alcohol products, I hereby acknowledge that I have not received any alcohol products from said party host. Also, in the event of injury or death, said party host is not to be held accountable. Please reply with your full name and today's date for your e-signature". *note: no text, no entry.* (310): Sorry bro, just a precaution. You know, ever since the "Jake incident". What a douche. http://tfl.nu/gxdj
  Replies (12) Good night (2755) Bad night (608)
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  (504): View more from Louisiana

  I need a Xanax. A Veggie Delight. And exhibition style sex.

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  (504): I need a Xanax. A Veggie Delight. And exhibition style sex. http://tfl.nu/xk62
  Replies (7) Good night (1576) Bad night (449) Order T-Shirt
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  (816): View more from Missouri

  i love him because he let me keep my UGGS on while we had sex

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  (816): i love him because he let me keep my UGGS on while we had sex http://tfl.nu/eas7
  Replies (18) Good night (1626) Bad night (1922) Order T-Shirt
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  (781): View more from Massachusetts

  BTW my friend remembers her as "the one with the pronounced chin"

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  (781): BTW my friend remembers her as "the one with the pronounced chin" http://tfl.nu/ul1h
  Replies (14) Good night (381) Bad night (734) Order T-Shirt
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  (612): View more from Minnesota

  I feel like, for the first time today, we had a healthy yolo.

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  (612): I feel like, for the first time today, we had a healthy yolo. http://tfl.nu/h4b8
  Replies (15) Good night (479) Bad night (893) Order T-Shirt
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  (562): View more from California

  New rule. No seeing movies about plane crashes after killer bong rips

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  (562): New rule. No seeing movies about plane crashes after killer bong rips http://tfl.nu/8ne3
  Replies (2) Good night (576) Bad night (271) Order T-Shirt
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  (202): View more from Washington, DC

  I kind of want to throw a lot of things at him. Mostly blunt, heavy objects.

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  (202): I kind of want to throw a lot of things at him. Mostly blunt, heavy objects. http://tfl.nu/vyxz
  Replies (2) Good night (635) Bad night (226) Order T-Shirt
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  (517): View more from Michigan

  And that's the fourth pair of yoga pants with unwashable stains from you.

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  (517): And that's the fourth pair of yoga pants with unwashable stains from you. http://tfl.nu/j63g
  Replies (12) Good night (859) Bad night (426) Order T-Shirt
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  (614): View more from Ohio

  Code 10 We gotta leave. Now. I took a dump in the upstairs toilet and its clogged and overflowing, and believe me I don't want to have to explain myself to this frat on parents weekend.

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  (614): Code 10 We gotta leave. Now. I took a dump in the upstairs toilet and its clogged and overflowing, and believe me I don't want to have to explain myself to this frat on parents weekend. http://tfl.nu/4bsk
  Replies (5) Good night (279) Bad night (648)

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