what do you mean I googled how to give an awesome blow job?
The is a pregnant woman in this Chipolte wearing a shirt that simply says ‘OOPS!’ across the tummy.
That baby is bound to be under-loved.
tequila makes her clothes fall off
wow Mom, sounds like youre having a good time
I'm starting to think The only feelings I have anymore are drunk and hung over
you can't hurt those
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
What kind of person begs for a BJ from someone who just got their wisdom teeth out?
Seriously... There's something wrong here. I'm drinking vodka to mask the smell of chocolate on my breath before I get home and he finds out. I fucking hate couple dieting...
your mascara is on the toilet seat from when you fell asleep last night
I have to stop drunkenly making out with guys just because they're tall or have a beard.
you know it's a good party when the fucking floor caves in. THE FUCKING FLOOR.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
For what it's worth, I didn't think that hitting you with a crowbar as hard as I did would break your arm like that. You should drink more milk.
But forealz I'm gonna need a solid 52 orgasms so hydrate.
I started my period on international women's day. It's like the world is congratulating me and punishing me for being a woman at the same time
He finally left. I didn't introduce him to the roommate. The sex is bad. I don't want him to feel welcome
Do you know anyone else that comes home with unexplainable injuries as many nights a week as we do?
stop texting me about your public sex.
says she who narrated getting eaten out in a movie theatre over text to me
Randomize