we went to that german restaurant and drank out of the boots. Then I threw up into one
glow-in-the-dark stars on his ceiling from '98 totally make blowing him more romantic.
I just saw a pair of panties stretched over a fire hydrant on campus... I need to get the fuck out of this town
I'm on page 4.
Im on beer infinity
I was actually high enough at that point that I was just casually following your glowing footsteps like in Avatar while we ran from the cops.
Should we buy the taco bell before hand? Not having taco bell on Quattro de mayo isn't a risk I'm willing to take
First sunburned tits of the season. And it's only April... I feel like it's going to be a good summer.
I'm going to get high and eat ice cream until the pain goes away. You're welcome to join.
My soul is telling me that I need to take this exam naked.
HahahahahaHAHAHAHAHAHAHA MY LIFE IS A CAUTIONARY TALE
The CEO is on this whole 'what do you do with your spare time?' kick. Umm... get drunk and have sex in bar parking lots.
I can't possibly be the only person who has ever eaten Cheetos with a spoon to avoid the powder getting in my fingers
It's going to be like a slumber party but with ketamine
By the time I realized I was watching a Danish porno with muppets it was already too late
you went over there?
His drunk texts were grammatically perfect. At least our kids will be smart.
Randomize
