is it bad if i hope guys are like edward cullen and can read my mind. i could be a whore in disguise.
Did you wake up with "jello shots" stamped on your hand too?
I came so hard that my back seriously popped like 5 times.
If you hook up with your cousin you will permanently be my favorite person ever.
Dude. Zebras have bad attitudes.
No, man, we stole the housekeeper's key and we're just going room to room raiding mini fridges. Hurry
Logan has the vodka and snickers. We're making a run for it. Room 302
A blow job from a tiger shark would still entail less risk to your genitals than having sex with her.
I'm going for high school drunk, you've got 15 minutes to get here.
Smoked a joint with my old camp counselor and now we're going to a strip club. There is a god.
Two run-ins with cops/park rangers tonight and now I'm just wandering around high and shirtless
Sacramento doesn't deserve you
Jesus, you make out with one twin then sleep with the other and suddenly they don't want to play soccer with you... So sensitive...
YOU BETTER NOT BE SHAVING YOUR LEGS RIGHT NOW IM TRYING TO HELP YOU
Her neighbors? They're nice. Young family. Tried not to get puke on their side of the lawn.
YOLO is a great motto until you end up with Chlamydia
In a few weeks I'll be a beautiful butterfly and me and my cat will have to repopulate the earth. WE WILL REBUILD!!
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